Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Toddlers and Dropped Food

Maya has been dropping a lot of food lately. Like any normal crumb-snatching scamp, she of course tries to pick the food back up and resume her feast. I don't think I am alone in noticing a natural evolution on how parents handle this situation with each successive kid. It pretty much goes like this.
Food dropped by:

  • 1st Child: Sprint over and separate the contaminated food from the Golden Child. Sanitize the baby's hands, face and all surrounding surfaces. Call doctor and Poison Control Center.
  • 2nd Child: Try to get to the food before the "5-second rule" expires. Blow off larger pieces of debris, maybe pour some water on it if any is available. Return food to child (unless incident is witnessed by other parents -- If other parents are present, see: "1st Child").
  • 3rd Child: Pretend you didn't see them drop it. It should really be a 35-second rule anyway. Resume yelling at the other two to stop arguing and put their damn shoes away.

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